How to Lose a Girl in Less Than 5 Seconds

Durex unleashed this site, Dickorations, on to the masses recently. Now you can print and cut out little outfits for your little friend. From their FAQ:

My penis has never worn an outfit. How do I know that it wants to?

How do you know that your penis DOESN'T want to wear an outfit? Has it told you? Never, ever, ever never assume that because your penis cannot express itself in "English" or "in writing" that it is satisfied being nude. It wants to dress for success just like you do. Just in much smaller sizes.

How do I let my partner know that I've started wearing Dickorations?

You should say, "Hello, partner. I've started wearing Dickorations." Or "Lookie here, I'm wearing a Dickoration now." Either way, they'll know.

Outfits currently available include a championship belt, a superhero cape, and a tuxedo, among others.